well i got up at oh my god its early so i could meet kd, borderduc, nim and davie at the straiton layby on the bypass and for once i wasnt last. those honours went to davie.we all set of with border leading as he was the most responsible adult amongst us and was in with a good chance of finding the place. if it had been davie god knows where we could have ended up.on getting there keith was waiting with the van keys for us, so we could lock away helmets etc.id hardly got my jacket off when jan was already down to her bikini top and shorts,just as i found i had to reach past her to get my keys or something out of my jacket. Admitedly it did take me 5 minutes to reach past her but it was worth it .we got inside the marquee to be greeted by a very attractive blonde lady, kerry, who is as nice to deal with as she looks. she rapidly sold me a ducati cap which i used to keep the sun of my bonce all day and damn fine i looked in it to,even if i say so myself.after a brief round of hellos ed, derek,et all,davie kindly volunteered me to accompany him on a trip round to the Eddie Stobbart team, to get the dun banner.When we got there, the chap we needed to speak to was a wee bit busy (think he was running the team or something), so we had a wee bit time to kill. i wanted to walk to the end of the pit row to see what was there and i dragged a reluctant davie along. as we were nearing the end, davie was telling me there was nothing there, when i spotted a barrier,behind it was a security guard and further on was 4 girls from the bennets insurance company getting their pictures taken, with their arms around each others waists.i mentioned to davie the words bennets girls and a transformation took place. from his week ive been ill concave look davie all of a sudden grew three inches taller, his chest puffed out and his hair seemed to smooth itself back into place.the jeans were howked up to tighten up on the package and the startings of a john travolta strutt became apparent.his eyes were now firmly focused on the 4 girls behinds and i could see the start of drool at the corners of his mouth. the john travolta strutt was replaced by the full on cocky lads swagger and no matter what angle his body was at his head never wavered. i realised i was now going to get the benefits of seeing davie at work. as i stopped at the barrier meant to stop us getting anywhere further davie just sauntered past with an air of indestructibility and his prey the poor bennets girls with theyre backs to him had no idea what was about to hit them .i shouted to dave that we werent allowed to go past the barrier but davie could no longer here me.his mind was only on his prey ,who still didnt know he was approaching. luckily for them but unluckily for davie the security guard managed to jump in front of him and tell him he wasnt allowed there. Davie in an unusually loud voice replied "i was going to see the bums" which made every bloke in the area burst out laughing.crest fallen davie turned round and came back to my side of the barrier .he then mentioned that as the toilets were right next to him and hed had a curry the night before he would just nip in and use them.
we then headed back and found the chap from stobbarts who had the banner, he seemed a nice guy and was very friendly, good of him to take the time when he was busy all weekend.Davie then introduced me to his friend sarah who was a brollie dollie, hed met at donnington,and she turned out to be a jolly nice person as well.
we headed back to the ducati marquee and as we got nearer we saw young nic (who fancies me, ill explain later) and her friend audrey unfortunatley they didnt see us, so with a roar davie launched himself at poor nic and all of a sudden she had a davie ravie two inches off her nose .no wonder she screamed poor lass.
after scaring the poor girl we headed back to the marquee where davie and martin put up the banner. i finally got round to the first of many cups of tea that day.i now spent several hours chatting to everyone meeting all the folks i hadnt met and continuing to annoy those i had met before.
looking at borderduc in his shorts sandals and floppy hat, i couldnt half get the feeling that he should be a farmer .with his feet in the soil rather than someone wanting to play with motorbikes. he gives off an aura of calm and at oneness with the world.
young nic had arrived back and for the first of many times that day i had to tell her to cover up her underwear.and i know for a fact thats a good sign a woman wants you, when you get to see her underwear, that and when she was talking to me she looked at me and wasnt sick, if thats not proof of lust i dont know what is, but alas it can never be cause im almost old enough to be her big brother, not only that i had to tie up her belt for her so being a gentleman i did it in a double not so it wouldnt come loose again, though she was worried she might not be able to go to the loo again now, but i think she managed . i liked her pal audrey and did wonder for a while ,why nic kept calling her odd, but eventually i realised there was nothing odd about her it was just her name shortened.i tried to get audrey to give me some juicy gossip about nic in her younger days, but being a good friend she didnt say a thing.dont bring her again lol
when the food supplies were available to eat, i tried to keep my cool and not look like a greedy scranner,but when i saw people getting in a queue, i panicked and ended up about 9th in the queue with duncan beside me .trying to pretend i had manners and looking to impress people, i decided to bite my cherry tomato in half rather than my usual crush it all in. it was a great idea except for it spraying tomato pips on my lovely white t shirt. but it was only a small stain and i thought i could get away with it. later i managed to miss my mouth with a cup of tea (i know im trying to work out how it happened as well),and spilt it all down my front. i couldnt wear the tshirt anymore. so i had the choice of walking about topless, like so many blokes were doing and showing of my scottish blue body, or i could go and buy a ducati polo shirt to wear. thankfully i did the latter. i then spent some time scrounging off others peoples plates, cause i didnt want to be the first person to go for seconds,thanks nic and davie for the sausage rolls.
i met foxy who chose that name as she was called fox,not for any other connotation,shes what i call a lovely lady,she laughed at my jokes smiled when i talked my usual nonsense and didnt tell me to @@@@ off so that makes her good in my books, i reckon shes about 35 tho she wouldnt tell me and i decided as she was 5`10" i wouldnt try to chat her up, as i never flirt with woman who look like they could give me a kicking.and she looked a hell of a lot fitter than me.
there is more to this story, but for your sake and mine im going to stop here.
i was dead chuffed for nicky, as she told me she passed with a 2.1 which i believe is very good. and it was really good to meet so many people from dun for the first time, and so many for the second or more.
personally i had a great day and hope you did too.
not everything i say in this is neccessarilly true some at least of it is more than likely ficticious and the developments of a really warped mind.no one should read anything at all into this,take offence or generaly believe it
